Seriously, Senior?

Um…Actually…

Seeing as how I’m the column in between John and Ben’s, I just want to set a few things straight. I’m actually the reason the website went through so many beautiful changes. In fact, it was the island energy of Aloha that persuaded John to finally rip the band-aid off and update our site. You’re welcome.bYes folks, you heard it here first, it was me, despite what you might have read on the page before this and what you will read on the page after this. Don’t listen to them, they ’re liars! You think a beautiful face like this would lie to you all? Of course not, I would never do such a thing. With that being said; you guys should totally check out our new and improved
website, it looks pretty snazzy.

Now that’s out of the way, there’s one last thing that I want to include in my column this week, and it’s a callout for the General Manager at The Cheesecake Factory Kapolei. I’m not sure If I’m legally allowed to put his full name here, but, if I were,I totally would. For the sake of legality though, I will not be doing so. However, I will be saying this: He is the worst general manager I have ever had the misfortune of having to interact with. I have
never met someone who has made their employees cry on more than
one occasion. I have also never met anyone with a neck so short and thick. It’s truly off-putting. The first time I met this man I went up to him and
I asked “Hey, can I guess your Harry Potter house?” and I immediately guessed Slytherin, wanna know why? Cause that man is evil, and it
was in his eyes. The craziest part was that I was RIGHT. I should’ve known right then and there what I was getting myself into. No one brags about being a Slytherin unless they’re a walking menace to society.
So, if you ever find yourself at The Cheesecake Factory in Kapolei, make sure to give the GM hell for me.