Words from a wallflower

My heart has been set on going to law school at the University of Oregon. It’s the only school I’ve toured that has family law with a concurrent master’s program in journalism. I felt like I was home when I toured the campus.

I’ve been waiting for almost twelve weeks to hear if I got accepted when I was given a deadline of six to eight. I’ve been frantically leaping at my phone whenever I get an email, thinking it would be the good news I was waiting for. After a phone call to the school that was spurred by impatience, I started my weekend with an email from Oregon admissions: “You have been placed on our waitlist. While this may be a disappointment . . .”

Yes, it is a disappointment. There is no “while” in this situation. It is just a disappointment.

All the people who were encouraging from the moment I decided to apply to law schools carried their same enthusiasm when I broke the news about my soft rejection. I’m trying to remain positive like them, but I’m not going to lie, this one stings.

I’ve always liked the feeling of knowing that I’m going somewhere. With my personality, I definitely will be. It just might not be law school, at least not right away. In addition to the University of Oregon, I’ve gotten waitlisted for two other law schools—Arizona State and the University of Washington—and accepted to one that I’m on the fence about—Hofstra University. I’m still awaiting other emails, and I have two more applications to submit. During this process, I’ve realized that applying to work at a law firm first is becoming an appealing option.

Trying to figure out what the hell to do with my life after graduation is overwhelming. I know I’m not alone in this. I thought I had a clear path, but it’s getting muddled. Deep down, I know that whether I get admitted from waitlists, work for a year and reapply, or simply just take a breather and decide to go down a completely different path, it’s going to be okay.

After I submit my last applications, all I can do is, quite literally, wait.