February isn’t a great month for single ladies.
Between the pre-Valentine’s Day anticipation and the post-Valentine’s Day chocolate discount, it seems to be a month where everyone seems entitled to know about your love life.
For those of us ladies who aren’t seeing that someone special, there comes a certain stigma. Single ladies are often looked at with a sigh of desperation and the thoughts of “Why is she single? Something must be wrong with her” or “She must be crazy because she can’t keep a man.”
None of those assumptions are true. Women are single for various reasons. Why do I need to justify why I am single for Valentine’s Day, when my male counterparts don’t? It’s acceptable for men to be single and it’s seen as a money saver. A man doesn’t have a girlfriend for Valentine’s Day: good job, now you don’t have to buy any overpriced flowers and chocolate. Then when a woman is single, it’s seen as sad, and inferred that she must be lonely.
I am here to clear the air about what it’s like to be a single lady in February in 2017. For starters, being single can be a powerful thing. It’s a time solely dedicated to focusing on personal development and being content with just yourself.
Being in a relationship doesn’t need to validate your life or college experience. Dating is messy and feelings get hurt. Everyone is on their own timeline for love and not wanting to be committed to someone right now is okay. I’ll say that again for the people in the back: not wanting to be committed to someone is okay.
Just because a woman is single, it doesn’t mean that she isn’t happy for her friends who are in happy relationships. The stereotype of angry or desperate single ladies towards women in relationships needs to go away. Those ideologies just reinforce that women need to be competitive with each other, rather than supportive of their lives and goals.
The single stage of life needs to be embraced, and it does not have to be justified to anyone no matter what holiday is near. February is the shortest month of the year. Single ladies, we can get through this.