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Gargoyles soon to grace Chancellor Horrell’s office

In a student fee referendum survey distributed and tabulated between 1 and 3 p.m. on Tuesday, March 21 of Spring Break, seven students unanimously voted to approve the construction of gargoyles around the windows of Chancellor Dorothy Horrell’s office on the 14th Floor of the Lawrence Street Building.

In what could be construed as a rash and underrepresented decision, students can expect to see their student fees at work as the construction of the gargoyles commences immediately. 

“We were aiming for spontaneity,” a statement from CU Denver administration said. “We were looking for the pure authentic reaction from students.” It seems that the idea did come organically from students. When asked where the idea came from, administration said it originated where most good ideas come from: waiting in line for food.

“We overheard a couple of students in line at Qdoba talking about the idea,” the statement continued. “In between scoops of queso and pico de gallo, the students seemed 100 percent onboard. We knew we had made the right call when we saw the impressive turnout of the students.”

CU Denver’s own Chancellor Dorothy Horrell has already made a tremendous impact since she was appointed in January 2016. In this exciting time of growth at CU Denver, both students and administration are looking for more ways to elevate the profile of the urban university.

However, the exciting project won’t be without hiccups. “I don’t know how we’re going to get those gargoyles up there,” the CU Denver architect commissioned for the project said. “It’s literally glass that we’re told to mount very heavy blocks of stone on. I don’t think it’s possible.”

As with most referendums, the decision has stirred some controversy. “Who approved this?” a second year biology major said. “Why would the university approve a student fee referendum that under one percent of students voted on?”

Other students were concerned with the time the survey was released. “It was a Tuesday on Spring Break,” a second-year graduate student said. “I was snowboarding like a normal person, not checking my email.”

One of the students who was in line at Qdoba when the idea was originally fleshed out spoke up as well. “I mean I was totally joking,” the third-year education major said. “But I guess it’s kinda cool.”

Students will be able to enjoy the view of Chancellor Horrell’s gargoyles from most parts of campus beginning October 2017. Students can also follow the progress of the project under the official hashtag #HorrellsGargoyles.

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