Unhappiest Hour

FOREST ROOM CAN BE BEAT

Forest Room Five has an atmosphere of kitschy wonder. Equipped with a patio and fi re pits, built in streams and bridges, the cabin-like interior and a variety of taxidermy scattered throughout, Forest Room creates an absorbing ambiance. But that’s really where its charm ends.

The milieu of Forest Room is without a doubt impressive, but it seems as if there was more effort put into trying to make the bar look cool than for it to actually be functional. e structure of the seating is awkward, and you either have to squeeze in between a copious amount of strangers to even get to the bar or risk falling into the fi re pit out on the patio.

Due to Forest Room being deemed as the “hip” spot to get a drink in the Lower Highlands—groan—and their happy hour spanning from 4:30 to 6:30 p.m., rest assured there will be a flock of LoDo bros and their girlfriends or potential hookups saturating the vicinity.

Not only is it usually packed with the worst people on the planet, but the service is equally terrible. Sure, it’s technically in the Highlands, but the service is not worth the drink price. It would not be shocking to realize that half of the staff is already completely stoned. Tge bartenders move across the bar as if they are insects stuck in amber, and if someone is lucky enough to get a drink, it will probably be the wrong one.